How's Your Day?

Exam in 2 days, tat is friday. currently, feeling everyone around me also studying like there's no tmr. indeed. well, as for me, as usual. lazy through the day. so here's how it goes :

6a.m. I hear tick tocks. i wish i could jz smash it on the floor so tat i doesn't need to wake up from my comfy bed n see those clowns. i tell myself to wake up for the sake of troublesome system. though i hav to admit tat the only thing tat keep me waking up is attendance n my mum's wake up wake up wake up. oh n my dearS.

3p.m. Another round of tick tocks. i hope tat i could jz throw it out of the window so tat i doesn't feel guilty for wasting time. i then tell myself tat i'll slp now n stay awake at night to compensate the time tat i let go out of my hands.

10p.m. When i'm working out *sleep earlier, wake up earlier* (back to 6a.m.) thingy, tick tocks again in my thoughts. i couldn't care less n dun bother to wish or hope anymore *white flag here*, i tell myself i'll do it tmr then i off the light n say goodnight.

And the routine goes on n on every single day. tat means i'm rotting every single day of my life.

p/s : stop asking me *wad u doing now?* my answer forever n ever will be sleeping, watching drama, staring on the wall n dreaming. as i always do. =)

By Urs Truly, as always.

Fact 1 : How i communicate wif ppl.
> If i dunnoe tat person = no emo + buay song face.
> If i noe tat person = no emo.
> If hi n bye frens = smile.
> If close frens *which i can tell them all my whinning n stuff* = talk to them auto = pour cold water to each other*

p/s : believe it a not, i dun look into ppl's face or wadsoeva if i'm not close to them. dun ask me why cox u'll be saying l.a.m.e. right after i tell u why.

Fact 2 : I'm str8 forward?
Seriously n for gudness sake, i am not THAT str8 forward.
> If i care bout u, i tell u the truth loh. u dun expect me to eat popcorn n watch the one i care to step into the hole n laugh right?
> At one point i reali buay tahan, i'll ask u to shut up but with manners alright. u dun expect me to sacrifice myself to endure things tat i dislike so much right? i am not tat GREAT. reali.
> It's not like i'm humble or something but at least i wun make up stories tat doesn't even exist. i just dun get it why ppl love exaggerating things n 24/7 throughout the year wanting to let ppl noe tat they work real hard but the truth is, the result comes out like shyt.
> I keep on telling ppl tat i did NOT study at all. but they jz dunwan to believe me. why all have such high expectations on me sia? my result says it all right? they still not willing to believe my words. u dun wan to believe, dun bother to ask or listen.

Fact 3 : Showing faces and attitude.
> I show faces when i dun smile. n ppl keep on telling me, ''dun so sad lah.'' ''why u look so sad.'' ''why u look so moody.'' ''cheer up lah.'' i am not sad or upset or anything. i just dun feel anything. i am bored. i am moodless. if i smile for nthg it makes me look like a total idiot, agree?
> I put everything on my face. i happy, sad, angry, or wadsoeva, it's very obvious to see from my face. gud oso lah actually. so tat i wun hav to listen any nonsence when i am not in the mood. leave me alone would do. as usual.
> When i'm happy, i'll smile all day long. when i'm upset, i'll curse throughout the day as well. when i dun talk, it doesn't mean tat i'm piss or sad or anything. becox my thoughts are elsewhere while staring outside the window. but when i'm high or excited, i laughed easily, loud.

Fact 4 : I deny tat i'm a control freak.
> Actually, i'm fine wif anything as long as i can accept tat particular thing.
> I dun chg my mind easily on wad i think was right but i do get influenced pretty quickly.
> Even if i chg something i'll get a ''yes'' from ppl concerned 1st alright? i respect ppl.
> If u noe me well, which obviously u dun, my quotes r ''cincai lah'' ''sidan lah'' ''anything lah'' ''oh..'' ''okay ah'' ''u like loh'' ''up to u lah''

Anyway, wondering why i'm typing all these crap here? becox it's randomly typed by urs truly. well, off to bed.

Stop Wadeva U're Thinking Right Now

Alright. i know there's been some talkings about me, behind my back. but, there r all not true. so dun believe any of them. not gonna write out wad happened, but if u wan to noe, u ask me, not other ppl. i noe i'm making those black faces but, tat shows how 'concern' r u to come n ask me right? hahaha. this is jz to avoid any misinfo. well, mouth to mouth, ear to ear, it is not accurate everytime. but dun expect much details from me. i'm not like 'fruitcake' telling people whenever wherever whoever, and the above all, the wrong info. i dun wish to make things big but, fruitcake is doing tat b4 i do. jz becox tat i have not taken any action YET doesn't mean tat i'm afraid or i have no pride or dignity according to fruitcake's fren. i am not avoiding. if u ppl eva have such organ which is brain, try to function it a little. do u reali think tat the RIGHT ones will and r avoiding the WRONG ones? if u do, there's only 2 possibilities n tat is, u're a complete idiotic, fool, dumb, physcho, maniac, freak, retarded, oh n maybe hmm s2pid? the other possibility is tat u're so innocent, in other word brainless tat u actually think tat way. many ppl've been telling me tat it is impossible to get wad they deserve due to some bias issues on-going but i'm not gonna jz let it off cowardly. u may think tat it's a small thing, but being insulted, oh n jz to make things clear, i did not get scolded. it's an insult and harassment. it unforgivable. u ask me to have a big heart and to forgive and forget? oh, tat's not gonna happen. tiny is completely rude, mental problem, irrational, judges a book wif it's cover, ego, self-centered, being too proud of tinyself *as if, n pls, do not make me puke on u by making me look down on u even more if u ever had selfpride n dignity* if only u knew wad is self control, if only u noe wad is proof and prove, if only u knew wad is manners, if only u knew wad is right and wad is wrong, if only u knew wad is humble, but it ain't gonna happen, becox if u surprisingly knew wad r those, if only u shockingly practice them, headlines tmr : "WORLD PEACE" n tat means, impossible. u call urself mature? grow up kid, stop being foolishly living in ur own world n start waking up n learn the cruelty of the reality. the truth is always cruel and mean to me. i noe, u ppl always refers this to me as well. but, i believe karma and retribution, it's jz a matter of time. i shall see wad's gonna happen next. if it's not settled tmr morning, let's start wad shud had started. yea yea, go ahead. find all the ppl u wan to. i'm fine wif it. u're wrong n i'm right. n tat's wad it matters.

p/s : i have already given u faces by calling u 'fruitcake'. in fact, i think it is an insult to the name itself and u better not pollute the name wif ur filthy dirty GGooG. n u noe wad, i felt so disgusting and dirty to have the same but so not same endings wif u.

even our great orang utan agree wif me.

actually it's not reali surprising. obviously.

hey, the elders seconds me too.

even the pets has better thoughts.

Happy Birthday JieJie

I know it is kinda late to say this, n i doubt u'll ever read this, but i just wanna say that i love and appreciate the moments we had tgether. the crying, laughing, teasing, scolding, annoying and irritating moments we had. such days would never come back and it would be part of my memory forever, well at least it would be until my short term memory take it away. but, we can always create new and better ones right? u can't get rid of me, FOREVER. hahaha. soh ngap =) quak quak..

Don't Laugh Reading This.

Happy Birthday To You,
Happy Birthday To You,
Happy Birthday To BenDan,
Happy Birthday To You,

p/s : randomly post for rememberance, lolss.

There's so many things i wish i could tell u but i couldn't, becos i forgot everything eventually. lols. i wish that i could get u something as a gift for ur birthday as this is a special year to u, but i dunnoe wad to giv, really. i mean, i dunnoe wad u like or wad u need. seriously. and i dun wanna buy u something randomly. well, u dun wan to receive something from me tat is not given sincerely too, right? so maybe someday somehow i'll make it up to u okay? hope u enjoy ur special day n cherish every special moment u are having now. *the moment u're reading this post is counted as special moment okay?* hahaha. love always, DIKDIK ! (i didn't reali mention name, so dun worry, nobody noe's hu u r)

No More Drama

It's exam week. since 2 weeks ago actually. lols. 3 more days to go. ahhhhh. anyway, i'd just finished reading through my old blog. back to 2 yrs ago, it's june. i was complanning about doing seni + geography folio and stuff. Then, last year, i was talking about having fun with friends hanging out. hmm, how do i feel? i feel so childish for actually believing there's such thing called "BFF" exist. anybody who actually know me, or maybe TRIED to know me, would know that i don't trust people easily. well actually it really depends though. if i feel that u're the right person for me to share secret, i'll share it. with certain limit of course. felt so STRESS today. rare enough to see this word appear in my blog?(shush pls, dun hav to remind me tat i dun bother about anything) not any other day, but today. surf the web just now. it makes me feel like a pathetic-desperato-loser(and again, i know, dun tell me, again). have u come acrossed a conversation that totally spoilt ur mood of the day? well, i just experienced it. it seriously-no-joking spoilt my mood. recently keep getting late to school. well, almost. just that one minute would change my day at school. close enough huh? Things could change in just one minute, what's more in a few days? well, let me see. uhm, i lost a -used-to-be-close-friend, i lost my pride, and the utmost is, i lost myself. it's really convincing tat i screwed my life. no doubt for tat actually. i don't wanna sound despo but, with all these happening recently, i gotto say, goodnight! xD might taking undang june holiday. currently threatening ppl to go wif me. ahahaha.

p/s : thank me for letting u knowing me better. *evil laughing*

Win Win Win

Wth. suddenly feel tat everyone around me are so hardworking. all chiong study already for spm. n it's only me. yes, me who have not started any revision yet. n i mean, not at all. okay. i have decided to ignore her forever and evermore. to think back, like now, i felt so s2pid and regret for depending on her and relying her. gosh. i mean, look at her. wait, i'm not trying to gossip her instead, i'm just telling the facts okay? i noe i'm nowhere better then her. but c'mon. it's like so obvious. okay, maybe she's better then me. BUT let's not make things ugly, yea? {give some face larh, it's my blog!} last word, I WILL BE ACHIEVE BETTER THEN HER ! i'm so gonna work on my determination. no more half-bucket-water. no more delays. no more last minute work. no more talking, only actions. if u ppl happen to see me online, n if u ppl so happen to love me, tell me to offline. gosh i'm piss off. win win win. i must win her. n i will. retard.

p/s : i buay song u. i despite u. i HATEEEE u.